Voodoo Dick Voodoo Dick There was this businessman who was getting

Voodoo Dick Voodoo Dick There was this businessman who was getting readyto go on a long business trip. He knew his wife was aflirtatious sort, so he thought he’d try to get hersomething to keep her occupied while he was gone, because hedidn’t much like the idea of her screwing someone else. Sohe went to a store that sold sex toys and started looking around. He thought about a life-sized sex doll, but that wastoo close to another man for him. He was browsing throughthe dildos, looking for something special to please hiswife, and started talking to the old man behind the counter. He explained his situation. The old man said, “Well, I don’treally know of anything that will do the trick. We havevibrating dildos, special attachments, and so on, but Idon’t know of anything that will keep her occupied forweeks, except — ” and he stopped. “Except what?” the man asked. “Nothing,nothing.” “C’mon, tell me! I need something!””Well, sir, I don’t usually mention this, but there is the’voodoodick.'” “So what’s up with this voodoo dick?” heasked. The old man reached under the counter, and pulled outan old wooden box, carved with strange symbols. He openedit, and there lay a very ordinary-looking dildo. Thebusinessman laughed, and said “Big fucking deal. It lookslike every other dildo in this shop!” The old man replied,”But you haven’t seen what it’ll do yet.” He pointed to adoor and said “Voodoo dick, the door.” The voodoo dick roseout of its box, darted over to the door, and started screwing the keyhole. The whole door shook with thevibrations, and a crack developed down the middle. Beforethe door could split, the old man said “Voodoo dick, getback in your box!” The voodoo dick stopped, floated back tothe box and lay there quiescent once more. “I’ll take it!”said the businessman. The old man resisted, saying it wasn’tfor sale, but he finally surrendered to $700 in cash. Theguy took it home to his wife, told her it was a special dildo and that to use it, all she had to do was say “Voodoo dick,my pussy.” He left for his trip satisfied that things wouldbe fine while he wasgone. After he’d been gone a few days,the wife was unbearably horny. She thought of several peoplewho would willingly satisfy her, but then she remembered thevoodoo dick. She got it out, and said “Voodoo dick, mypussy!” The voodoo dick shot to her crotch and startedpumping. It was great, like nothing she’d ever experienced before.After three orgasms, she decided she’d had enough, andtried to pull it out, but it was stuck in her, stillthrusting. She tried and tried to get it out, but nothingworked. Her husband had forgot to tell her how toshut itoff. So she decided to go to the hospital to see if theycould help. She put her clothes on, got in the car andstarted to drive to the hospital, quivering with every thrustof the dildo. On the way, another orgasm nearly made herswerve off the road, and she was pulled over by a policeman.He asked for her license, and then asked how much she’d hadto drink. Gasping and twitching, she explained that shehadn’t been drinking, but that a voodoo dick was stuck inher pussy, and wouldn’t stop screwing. The officer looked ather for a second, and then said “Yea, right… Voodoo dick,my ass!”

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