Top Ten Organized Crime Money Savings Tips
10. When taking a body out to Jersey, use mass transit.
9. Every time you kill a guy, put a nickel in a jar.
8. Tap into nearly endless supply of cheap Mexican hit-men.
7. Make threatening phone calls after 11pm, when rates are lowest.
6. When you whack two or three guys, stuff them in same trunk and carpool it.
5. Inexpensive pinkie ring substitute: Plastic tab-pull from half gallon of orange juice.
4. Fire pricey nickname consultants — everyone is either “Fat Tony” or “Knuckles.”
3. Pasta is very inexpensive and very filling. 2. Forget expensive car bombs–just sneak up behind the guy and yell, “Ker-pow!”
1. Limit yourself to ten “fugeddaboudits” a day.